We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
i now understand why vodka
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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