Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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