I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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