I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
