return my video game
my mouth tastes like poor choices
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize