Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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