Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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