6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
