You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
