Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
