Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Randomize
