Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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