i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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