u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
