You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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