Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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