The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize