your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
