So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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