can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
