I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I'm at about main and main street
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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