I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
