hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
