I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
