fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
