I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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