His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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