dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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