Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
