Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
