yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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