She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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