Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
