He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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