it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
