The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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