You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
