In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Sorry about my life...
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
