hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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