their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I am one with the molecules
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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