So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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