Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
