it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
