this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
