We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
