no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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