Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
