Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
