its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
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