I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I want to make a zoo with you.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
